Screwed Up Semester

*sigh* Another semester coming to an end, and this semester is no different either besides me being in another campus. It has been lots of Ups and Downs, well, I think more stuffs on the Down side. Haven't been consistently attending for lectures, missed a couple of assignments which is a big No No and yet here I am, still waiting and waiting and doing nothing when the final exams are just around the corner. I have a few assignments due before the exams, one of them worth a whooping 35% of my grade which I have to design a book cover, then another one which I have to complete by Monday with my partner (almost done with that one), one due tomorrow, which I have not have a look at yet *sigh* and the last one due next Friday. So all together 4 assignments and I have to admit this semester the assignments are killing me plus my lazyness. Perhaps I am cursed? I do not know but ever since I injured my head, there's this constant pain at the back of my head and at times it is pretty distracting. I am not sure whether I can get thru this semester without a scratch, everything seems pretty tough. At times, I really don't understand what the hell am I doing at all, I just sit in front of the PC and just stare at the screen (my buddy calls it "dilly dally") There is this one question up in my head, where do people get the determination to study study study most of the time as what a student should be doing. I need that answer quick or else I am going to be stucked as a student for the rest of my life. Last semester I had already noticed the lapse in concentration and determination to do well in my studies, as a result, my grades wasn't that good. This semester most probably be hopeless, but I guess it is never too late to pick it up. But how? How to pull myself together? Ironically there has not been any major happenings this semester, so no distractions at all, just that head incident. Perhaps that was the turning point. A friend told me that perhaps I'm getting bored with life in Australia, that's why I'm not doing well at the moment.*sigh* Just feeling lazy. I'm even too lazy to update the blog frequently, hopeless.

In realisation
Lately, I realise something, something that is not so good news for me. I realise that I have a problem with my eye-sight. I know, it's not a big deal but to me I always hope that I will have a perfect eye-sight, why? So I can realise my childhood dream as a pilot. But that's just a dream. Another thing I realise is that I'm losing confidence every second. Everyone who knows me sort of said what happen to the person I was last time, full of confidence.*sigh* I don't feel the same way as I do, or maybe I have to realise that I have been declining like forever. Have you ever had people telling you that you are smart but you think you are not? Or perhaps you just look smart but actually you are not? Questions but no answers.

Naggings...
My mum always reminds me that she's waiting for me to graduate. She always says that she can't wait for me to graduate. She always says that I should quickly graduate so that she can quit her job. She always says that she is getting sick of her job and she is getting old. She always says the same sentences as mentioned when I call back home and have a chat with her. And everytime before she hungs up, she will say "You know you can do it because you are smart" and yet everytime she says that she is getting old, I would never thought of her being old when I look at the family photo I have in my room.




see what I mean when I say she doesn't look old? =b
and she gave me this teddy bear so that it will remind me to graduate as soon as possible -.- pfft





Ben